Recently I spent the evening in the company of some amazing people, some of whom are at the beginning of their journey of healing.
We were very honest with each other about where we were in our journeys. As each one spoke, I found myself remembering those first few months of my own journey. I remember how confused I was, how utterly afraid of being rejected, how guilty I felt for looking after me. How it felt so awkward not to jump in and offer advice to people I loved who were obviously struggling. And there were times I failed to refrain from doing it. But the new lifestyle eventually started to become more real to me than the frantic "gotta-fix-it" mentality to which I had once clung.
Being around people just starting to figure things out in their own process helps me remember myself at that stage and allows me to not only be grateful for the progress since that time, but to give hope - to those who are struggling - that it does get better, that there is freedom, peace, happiness, confidence, and love.
It keeps me grounded. Like the biblical tree planted by rivers of water, my new growth keeps people engaged and interested in what I have to contribute, and my shade gives solace to weary travellers and knowledge that it's okay to rest when they are tired, and gives them strength - if they so choose - on which to lean. Others were that tree for me in my own journey, and although I'm not far enough along to build a tire swing on, I've learned and grown enough to be able to let people know that it's never too late, that even though the road is hard and the weather harsh, it's going to be okay because nobody has to go it alone.
Remembering where I was at that time also helps me to be gentle with those who are truly confused, and to let them grow and mature at their own pace. If they ask for guidance, I try to only say what worked for me, because they might have a different location where their seed is planted - and what worked for me might not work for them. And I learn from all of them - no matter where they are on their path - honesty and vulnerability are key. My contact with them helps me stay grounded, keeps me thinking of myself the way I need to, and not any more (or less) highly than that.
Nope. I would not abandon this new lifestyle and go back to the old one. It's just not what I want anymore. I like this life. I like the feeling of being grounded and being able to help others send forth roots of their own.
We were very honest with each other about where we were in our journeys. As each one spoke, I found myself remembering those first few months of my own journey. I remember how confused I was, how utterly afraid of being rejected, how guilty I felt for looking after me. How it felt so awkward not to jump in and offer advice to people I loved who were obviously struggling. And there were times I failed to refrain from doing it. But the new lifestyle eventually started to become more real to me than the frantic "gotta-fix-it" mentality to which I had once clung.
It keeps me grounded. Like the biblical tree planted by rivers of water, my new growth keeps people engaged and interested in what I have to contribute, and my shade gives solace to weary travellers and knowledge that it's okay to rest when they are tired, and gives them strength - if they so choose - on which to lean. Others were that tree for me in my own journey, and although I'm not far enough along to build a tire swing on, I've learned and grown enough to be able to let people know that it's never too late, that even though the road is hard and the weather harsh, it's going to be okay because nobody has to go it alone.
Remembering where I was at that time also helps me to be gentle with those who are truly confused, and to let them grow and mature at their own pace. If they ask for guidance, I try to only say what worked for me, because they might have a different location where their seed is planted - and what worked for me might not work for them. And I learn from all of them - no matter where they are on their path - honesty and vulnerability are key. My contact with them helps me stay grounded, keeps me thinking of myself the way I need to, and not any more (or less) highly than that.
Nope. I would not abandon this new lifestyle and go back to the old one. It's just not what I want anymore. I like this life. I like the feeling of being grounded and being able to help others send forth roots of their own.
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