Blee-doop

Once in a while I hear a little chirp every so often, coming from another room.  Blee-doop.  Five minutes later, blee-doop.

Graphic "Low Battery" courtesy of
David Castillo at
www.freedigitalphotos.net

My cell phone is asking me to feed it.  I try not to let it get that hungry but sometimes I forget...and it tells me what it needs.  If I ignore it, the battery loses its charge altogether and the sound stops.  That isn't a good thing especially if the phone isn't where I usually keep it! But all I need to do is plug the charger in for a few hours and it soaks up energy like a little sponge, making the phone usable again.


I guess I get like that too.  Battery low.  

I get used too much, take on too much - or go too long without doing things that replenish my energy - and I start blee-dooping at people.  Any people but especially those who are closest to me.  Usually in a very annoying fashion.  This means I get all selfish, self-centred, and nasty with people...unthinking, uncaring.  It happens.  When I catch myself doing it (or occasionally, when a good friend calls me on it) it's never a pleasant experience - but it does alert me to the fact that I have been putting myself out too much and not taking anything in to recharge my batteries.

And occasionally, like today, my batteries get recharged without me having to make the time to do it.  People's sleep schedules were such that I was able to spend some quality time with my hubby before anyone else got up.  We got some shopping done before the stores got crowded.  It was nice - it was leisurely.  And when we did run some errands with one of our crew, it was short and we could spend some more time just relaxing for what seems like the first time in weeks. 

Nobody is like the Energizer Bunny.  We all need recharging.  Some more often than others, perhaps.

Different things drain me:

• I spend time with more than 4 people at a time or even one other person when I feel like I must be on my guard.
• I feel pressured into doing something I don't want to do, and judged when I say no.  Or ... I give in and say yes, and then resent every minute as well as the person who guilted me into it.
• I shop when the department or grocery stores are busy.  (Bad move...my skin starts to crawl and my fuse gets shorter...)



Photo "Blurred People Walking On The Street"
by surasakiStock at www.freedigitalphotos.net

• Or I am around people who are fighting with each other - voices raised, doors slammed, etc.

Blee-doop.

• I go to a gathering - whether church, a team meeting, or whatever - where I feel like nothing is being accomplished and I'm just going through the motions.
• I go without nourishing my spirit (listening to music, reading and meditating on Scripture and my recovery readings).
• Or I let people walk all over me - and don't stand up for what I want, and resentment builds up in me.

Blee-doop.

It doesn't take very long to recharge, just the decision to allow recharging to happen and making time for it if need be.  Thank God for earphones, Youtube, and unexpected quiet moments throughout the day.  Thank God for the beauty of nature.  Thank God for the ability to go for a walk if I need to do that.  Such things feed my soul.  That's what today has been like so far.

And if it changes - I can always go for a walk later - or go visit with some friends in a place where I feel safe and at home.  

That sounds like a plan.