Saturday, February 19, 2011

It's Gotta Land Somewhere - Thank God!

A co-worker was telling me a couple of days ago, about an emergency at her house.  

The ceiling had a crack in it for years but with all the snow we had lately, the crack grew by a foot and a half only a few days ago.  So she and her husband went outside.  He got on the roof and started shoveling snow off of it.

She was below.  There wasn't enough room down there to put all that snow, so her job was to clear away what he was throwing off the roof!  Every time she got more space cleared away, more snow got dumped on her from above!!  She joked - "Sounds like the perfect government job!"  We had a good laugh about that.  I even asked her if I could use the story for my blog (grin).  She said sure!

It seems everything I hear reminds me of the incredible journey I've been on the last 2 years.  When I first started ... I had a lot of work to do in getting rid of some things that had been weighing on me for so many years and which were causing damage to me and to my relationships.  In fact, there was so much stuff inside of me that shouldn't have been there, that I didn't know where to put it all.  Thank God I had the help of a counselor who I believe God put in place for me at just the right time.  Someone who had been where I was, who had gone through the process and could help me through it, clear away all the wreckage as I unloaded it.  For, you see, it had to come out - and it had to go somewhere.  He took that.  He accepted me, just as I was - and seeing that I was willing to go through that process he walked me through it, every step of the way.

In many ways he saved my life.  I truly believe that - because at that point I was dying inside.  

I'm not negating the amazing and central role that God played in my recovery from those things.  I AM saying that this counselor gave me a safe place to land - and it's gotta land somewhere when you unburden yourself of the poison of decades of every kind of abuse imaginable.  

In essence - with no disrespect to Jesus - to me, he was "God with skin on."  Someone I could sit across from, who had once been in the same dark, slimy pit as I was and who decided never to forget it - to go back and help others out of it the way he was helped.  His primary goal was to refocus me into my own recovery, not into anyone else's, to give my stuff a safe and accepting place to be brought out into the open and dealt with, and to walk beside me on the path to freedom.

Thank God!

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