Sunday, December 11, 2011

Ready for Christmas

Well, there are less than two weeks until Christmas morning.  How time flies!

Every year it gets harder and harder for me to find that special Christmas spirit I had when I was young and full of boundless energy.  Perhaps it's because as I get older I see more that jades me.  Perhaps. 

It could be that I am overwhelmed by the social expectations and the pressing crowds of people, both of which push me WAY outside my comfort zone.  Not to mention that a favorite gift that people tend to give to each other happens to be perfume, which they try out - in the store - before they buy. [Different post, different problem.]  ;)

Or perhaps I've allowed other things to creep in and rob me of the simple pleasures I used to enjoy a lot more often when I was younger: watching the lights sparkle off the tinsel, listening to the music the season has to offer, wrapping (or making) presents for those whom I love while imagining how much they'll appreciate them, planning a Christmas menu, making my famous deep-dish pumpkin pie (well, famous in my family anyway.) 

I do miss very much the old-fashioned Christmas Eve service, the kind with candles and singing those hard-to-play and almost as hard-to-sing carols, the kind of service that takes us back to the baby in the manger and doesn't focus on the gloom and doom that is all around us every day - I think we're aware enough to know there are people at war all over the world, and I want to hear about the peace inside - and the reason for it.  I miss that kind of Christmas message.  I miss it a lot.  

I would love to be more ready for Christmas ... and by ready I don't mean for me to have a whole lot of presents under the tree (although it would be nice to have the ones I ordered come in before the big day so that I can have them wrapped).  No, by "ready" I mean that I wish that my heart would be ready.  Sometimes I feel like there's such a hard crust on it, that it's so calloused by having to pay the bills and make a living that it's forgotten how to live.  I think that I might be more "ready" for Christmas year after year (starting with this year) if I were to make it a point to look after that calloused heart, to soften it with some soul-soothing music, to nurture it in reading uplifting words of hope and life, to rest it by taking more quality time to spend with its creator instead of running around half-crazed.  

It's really about time I got ready.

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