"Mona, take a break."
This is my favorite line from an old Caramilk TV ad from 1973, where Leonardo da Vinci tells Mona Lisa (as he is painting her portrait) to take a break because he can't get her to smile just right. So she takes a bite of the Caramilk and the rest - "Mona! hold it!" - is history.
Back before I started my process of healing, I would come home from work and hit the ground running. Hang up my coat, put supper on the stove immediately. Go, go, go. Gotta, sposta, woulda-coulda-shoulda, as the events of the day whirled around in my head. (Whew!)
And when I was healing, one of the things I decided to do in order to look after myself and support my healing process was to take about twenty minutes or so when I got home and do whatever it is that I wanted to do. I still do it. I call it "unwinding." It's pretty incredible what just that 20 minutes does - it allows me to shed the stresses of the day and gear up for the events of the evening, whatever that holds in store. I can check my emails, start a blog post, read something from a book, or even have a conversation with someone via Skype or one of the social media. It doesn't take long, but it is time well-spent.
What it does for me is freshen and sharpen my perspective, bring me into the moment, boost my gratitude factor, and underline for me the relatively new fact of life that I am a person too, and that I have the right to be cared for. Even if I'm the one doing the caring. That it's okay - that I'm worth looking after.
When I feel that uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, when I sense the slime of that slippery slope of becoming too personally involved in things that are none of my business, I know that there is an area of my life which needs work. I have allowed myself to slip back into the insanity of trying to fix or rescue people, or otherwise influence the behavior of a person or the outcome of someone else's situation or plan.
That is the time I need to pull aside and look after me. Unwinding, taking a break, looking after myself reminds me of the existence of boundaries that other people have, because it reminds me of my own boundaries. Since the concept of boundaries is a new one, it is helpful for me to keep it front and centre so that I won't forget and cross one - or allow one to be crossed. This makes for better relationships with God, with myself and with others.
It's funny how that works. But it works. Every time.
This is my favorite line from an old Caramilk TV ad from 1973, where Leonardo da Vinci tells Mona Lisa (as he is painting her portrait) to take a break because he can't get her to smile just right. So she takes a bite of the Caramilk and the rest - "Mona! hold it!" - is history.
And when I was healing, one of the things I decided to do in order to look after myself and support my healing process was to take about twenty minutes or so when I got home and do whatever it is that I wanted to do. I still do it. I call it "unwinding." It's pretty incredible what just that 20 minutes does - it allows me to shed the stresses of the day and gear up for the events of the evening, whatever that holds in store. I can check my emails, start a blog post, read something from a book, or even have a conversation with someone via Skype or one of the social media. It doesn't take long, but it is time well-spent.
What it does for me is freshen and sharpen my perspective, bring me into the moment, boost my gratitude factor, and underline for me the relatively new fact of life that I am a person too, and that I have the right to be cared for. Even if I'm the one doing the caring. That it's okay - that I'm worth looking after.
When I feel that uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, when I sense the slime of that slippery slope of becoming too personally involved in things that are none of my business, I know that there is an area of my life which needs work. I have allowed myself to slip back into the insanity of trying to fix or rescue people, or otherwise influence the behavior of a person or the outcome of someone else's situation or plan.
That is the time I need to pull aside and look after me. Unwinding, taking a break, looking after myself reminds me of the existence of boundaries that other people have, because it reminds me of my own boundaries. Since the concept of boundaries is a new one, it is helpful for me to keep it front and centre so that I won't forget and cross one - or allow one to be crossed. This makes for better relationships with God, with myself and with others.
It's funny how that works. But it works. Every time.
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