R-E-S-P-E-C-T

We saw it going through school.  Perhaps we did it; perhaps we had it done to us.

Some of us experienced it at home, even.  Unspeakable things said and done to the most vulnerable of humans: children in a relationship with parent, sibling, relative, mentor. Unspeakable.

Bullying (abuse, discrimination, harassment) hurts.  It hurts everyone: aggressor, victim, bystanders, friends, relatives, those in authority and those with none at all.  And if humans are constantly evolving into a better state ... I really don't see it.  Except that it's worse, more intense, and lasts longer when it happens now than it did when I was growing up.

It doesn't end at graduation either.  Bullies in the school playground or in the locker room become bullies in whatever profession they choose.  Some of these are on construction sites and in stores; others are in the boardroom, still others become teachers, doctors, lawyers, or coaches themselves and trample all over their peers to get to be in charge.  Workplace bullying is very real.  It might look a bit more subtle but it happens just the same.  Harassment, whether sexual, physical, verbal or exclusion, is the cause of so  many people becoming depressed, getting physically sick, less productive, and more apt to entertain thoughts of suicide.  And it doesn't just happen there.

It happens in the church too.

How often we've trusted someone in the church, someone who has betrayed us after we opened our heart to that person.  How many times we've left a church service or a church-sponsored event feeling bullied, condemned, or torn to pieces by something said either over the pulpit or in the hallways by those who, twenty or thirty minutes earlier, had their eyes raised heavenward and were singing their hallelujahs and shouting their Amens!!  One would think that Christians, because we answer to a higher power than the state, would be the first to treat each other with respect.  In many cases we do.  Sadly, though, some of the worst hurts of all have come from within the four walls of supposedly the safest place to be: church.

The Canadian Human Rights Commission is very clear.  Harassment (or bullying) is not acceptable and is against the law. See their definition by clicking this link.  That I would even feel the need to talk about this issue ... saddens me.  Every day, there are people considering the unthinkable just because someone will not get off their case.


So for the record, here are some simple guidelines.

1. Treat others the way you wish they would treat you.  (This does NOT include making sexual advances in any form!!)
2. Silence does not necessarily mean agreement. If in doubt about how someone really feels, back off and lighten up or they'll NEVER share how they feel.
3. Friendship does NOT mean you can say what you want in whatever way you want, and the other person will separate the wheat from the chaff.  That's not friendship, that's having a whipping boy.
4. Every person, no matter what they look like or how old, rich, skinny, or charismatic they are, is worthy of consideration and respect.  People don't go around carrying big signs that say what they're struggling with.  Everyone needs another chance.

In conclusion, let me point you to a video someone shared with me recently, something that touches the every-day.  It might help you (as it did me) see the world with new eyes. I can't display the video here, but I can give you the link on YouTube...


Paradigm Shift Video