"If it feels good," goes the old saying from decades ago, "do it."
Hm. I remember sermons about the evils of that saying, calling it hedonistic, condoning the love of pleasure rather than of God. But I think it's all in how you take it.
Perhaps it's better with a qualifier. As long as it doesn't disrespect yourself, as long as it has a consequence that builds you up and doesn't eventually destroy you spiritually, physically, or emotionally, you might want to consider the idea that it's a good thing.
I know people - and I am one of them a lot of times - who stay in unhealthy situations and/or relationships far too long and don't stand up for themselves or don't walk away out of fear of what the other person or people involved might think. Some of those same people are afraid to enter what could be healthy situations or relationships out of fear of being rejected, not fitting in, or just out of habit. "It's always been this way."
Sometimes we can get in a rut, you know? Doing the same things, watching the same TV shows, hanging out with the same people, having the same arguments (er, um, intense discussions). We spin our wheels and don't allow ourselves to do what feels good for us - some call this "novel" idea "self-care!"
Maybe we think that doing something for ourselves is a sign that we're selfish people (or not selfless people). But it's been my experience that if I don't look after myself, I suffer in the long run. I become depleted, I run on empty, I run out of emotional gas, I don't have anything left to give yet I insist on continuing to give because it's expected of me - and that's the place where resentment, bitterness, and depression breed. I know. That's where I lived for decades.
There's a word that's really popular in evangelical Christian circles - stewardship. Most people think of that as taking care of the things and people with which or with whom God has entrusted you: family, friends, job, finances, time. Interesting that "yourself" is not listed - not even thought of. But God has also given us our selves - and not taking care of ourselves is just as irresponsible as not taking care of our loved ones. It's like we're taking this huge untapped asset and burying it in the dirt because we're afraid of taking a risk on it. We've undervalued it. And someday we may be called to give an account of that.
We need to know in our innermost being that we have value. Not to others, that's not what I mean. So many people get their sense of worth from other people and wonder why relationships either are impossible to maintain or unattainable in the first place. It's because the focus is backward. The primary relationship is with the self. If we are not comfortable in our own skin, nobody else will enjoy being with us. Enjoying our own company is the first step to healthy and fulfilling relationships with others. We can't do that by forcing ourselves to take last place all the time and be miserable as a result.
Taking the time that it takes to nurture ourselves is going to pay off in so many other ways. Taking risks, learning something new, growing in some way that enhances our selves, this is time well spent and will pay dividends we never imagined.
What's stopping us from taking those risks? Today is a great day to start. If it feels good, if it will build us up and not hurt us in the long run, then let's do it!
Hm. I remember sermons about the evils of that saying, calling it hedonistic, condoning the love of pleasure rather than of God. But I think it's all in how you take it.
Perhaps it's better with a qualifier. As long as it doesn't disrespect yourself, as long as it has a consequence that builds you up and doesn't eventually destroy you spiritually, physically, or emotionally, you might want to consider the idea that it's a good thing.
I know people - and I am one of them a lot of times - who stay in unhealthy situations and/or relationships far too long and don't stand up for themselves or don't walk away out of fear of what the other person or people involved might think. Some of those same people are afraid to enter what could be healthy situations or relationships out of fear of being rejected, not fitting in, or just out of habit. "It's always been this way."
Sometimes we can get in a rut, you know? Doing the same things, watching the same TV shows, hanging out with the same people, having the same arguments (er, um, intense discussions). We spin our wheels and don't allow ourselves to do what feels good for us - some call this "novel" idea "self-care!"
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| This cool photo was one I found at discoverfrance |
There's a word that's really popular in evangelical Christian circles - stewardship. Most people think of that as taking care of the things and people with which or with whom God has entrusted you: family, friends, job, finances, time. Interesting that "yourself" is not listed - not even thought of. But God has also given us our selves - and not taking care of ourselves is just as irresponsible as not taking care of our loved ones. It's like we're taking this huge untapped asset and burying it in the dirt because we're afraid of taking a risk on it. We've undervalued it. And someday we may be called to give an account of that.
We need to know in our innermost being that we have value. Not to others, that's not what I mean. So many people get their sense of worth from other people and wonder why relationships either are impossible to maintain or unattainable in the first place. It's because the focus is backward. The primary relationship is with the self. If we are not comfortable in our own skin, nobody else will enjoy being with us. Enjoying our own company is the first step to healthy and fulfilling relationships with others. We can't do that by forcing ourselves to take last place all the time and be miserable as a result.
Taking the time that it takes to nurture ourselves is going to pay off in so many other ways. Taking risks, learning something new, growing in some way that enhances our selves, this is time well spent and will pay dividends we never imagined.
What's stopping us from taking those risks? Today is a great day to start. If it feels good, if it will build us up and not hurt us in the long run, then let's do it!
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