It creeps up on you.
Too many sacrifices, too many times of being taken for granted, too many adjusted expectations, they all take their toll. One thing leads naturally to the next and before you know it, you're up to your eyeballs in stress and wondering how you got there.
I know. It happens to me. Not as often as before, to be sure, but it still happens. Then something kind of shifts, one more task added to the pile and then ... you feel overwhelmed and wanting to quit everything. The trouble is, everything you committed to doing is perfectly fine and even commendable.
There's just one thing missing.
You.
Somehow, in looking after everyone else, in taking on too much at once, or in unexpected circumstances, life just gets to be so jam-packed that things start spilling over and falling to the floor. And the one getting the short end of the stick is you.
The concept of self-care is an uncomfortable one for many people. "Nice" people put others first. "Nice" people don't ask for what they want. We are taught from our formative years that it's selfish to think of ourselves first. However, it just doesn't make sense to expend so much energy on other people that we have nothing left for ourselves, which kind of defeats the purpose because if we don't have anything to give, we can't give anything.
And so we end up feeling weary, unappreciated, even resentful. Those are good warning signs.
You're the only you that you have. There is only one you, and you are important... whether you believe it or not!
Imagine yourself as a container, a large glass of water, let's say. People come to you with smaller glasses and ask you to give them something to drink. There is only so much in your glass. You empty yourself out and there is nothing left to pour into anyone else's life. However, if you turn your thinking around and go to a mountain spring, and you let the spring spill into your glass, up to the brim and overflowing, people come to you and they are automatically filled ... but you are not depleted.
Yet, it takes effort to get to the spring. You have to say no to filling up the next person's glass who comes to you with his or her need. And the next. Maybe a whole lot of next people. You need to look after your own needs so that you can have something to give to those who need it.
This is a small thought (or is it?) that could yield great results in your life. It's at least worth thinking about.
Too many sacrifices, too many times of being taken for granted, too many adjusted expectations, they all take their toll. One thing leads naturally to the next and before you know it, you're up to your eyeballs in stress and wondering how you got there.
I know. It happens to me. Not as often as before, to be sure, but it still happens. Then something kind of shifts, one more task added to the pile and then ... you feel overwhelmed and wanting to quit everything. The trouble is, everything you committed to doing is perfectly fine and even commendable.
There's just one thing missing.
You.
Somehow, in looking after everyone else, in taking on too much at once, or in unexpected circumstances, life just gets to be so jam-packed that things start spilling over and falling to the floor. And the one getting the short end of the stick is you.
The concept of self-care is an uncomfortable one for many people. "Nice" people put others first. "Nice" people don't ask for what they want. We are taught from our formative years that it's selfish to think of ourselves first. However, it just doesn't make sense to expend so much energy on other people that we have nothing left for ourselves, which kind of defeats the purpose because if we don't have anything to give, we can't give anything.
And so we end up feeling weary, unappreciated, even resentful. Those are good warning signs.
You're the only you that you have. There is only one you, and you are important... whether you believe it or not!
Imagine yourself as a container, a large glass of water, let's say. People come to you with smaller glasses and ask you to give them something to drink. There is only so much in your glass. You empty yourself out and there is nothing left to pour into anyone else's life. However, if you turn your thinking around and go to a mountain spring, and you let the spring spill into your glass, up to the brim and overflowing, people come to you and they are automatically filled ... but you are not depleted.
Yet, it takes effort to get to the spring. You have to say no to filling up the next person's glass who comes to you with his or her need. And the next. Maybe a whole lot of next people. You need to look after your own needs so that you can have something to give to those who need it.
This is a small thought (or is it?) that could yield great results in your life. It's at least worth thinking about.
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| Photo "Waterfall In Forest" courtesy of Witthaya Phonsawat at www.freedigitalphotos.net |
Absolutely true. Parker Palmer, in his book, Let Your Life Speak, says this (and I'm paraphrasing b/c I'm too lazy to go find the book and the exact quote): Self care is good stewardship of the self that we were put on earth to be.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jeannie. :)
ReplyDelete