TL4E

Hubby listening to someone
tell a story

Today I celebrate thirty-two years of marriage with a man I love more and more as time goes on. In a day when even TWO years seems the breaking-point for some, some folks marvel at our time together and wonder what our secret is, given all we've been through together.

The key word is together - it is not some great secret. We are best friends first, and while each of us has his or her own interests, many of them overlap and we can share them and enjoy each other in the sharing. We spend our spare time together. We agreed long ago that any lengthy social event that would separate us (especially overnight), even if it were to be touted as "good" - was not something that the person invited would attend. This has not been a sacrifice for us, but a happy choice, because it gives us more time with each other. That time is precious to us because there are so many mandatory things that demand our time (work, for example) that we treasure the opportunities we have to spend time with each other - even if it's sitting in a room saying nothing while each is doing something different on the computer.

Together we have faced so many things better than we would ever have done apart: for example, among other things, severe financial difficulty, early parenthood, and family-of-origin issues for both of us, not to mention the frustrations inherent in working with others (misunderstandings, people playing politics, bullying, fatigue). We support each other and gain strength from each other. We pray with and for each other. We put each other's needs before our own. We don't approach the relationship from the perspective, "What can I get out of this?" but rather, "What can I give?"

That's love. TL4E - True Love 4 Ever.

If there's a secret, it's that love is not about getting what you want, but giving what you dare not keep.

Happy anniversary, sweetheart.  ♥